February 2010
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“Before finding success as a comedian, Spade made money by working as […] a...”
– David Spade
“Meanwhile, Klosterman doesn’t understand the meaning of “trolling” in an...”
– Nerdshares, you must forgive him. He is an Old, after all.
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“How do you know this is a scene from a Kevin Smith film? The imitation of a...”
– Cop Out | rogerebert.com
Typically I find Ebert to have his finger right on the pulse, but I think it’s unfair to put these gripes down to Kevin Smith. I know it’s so vogue to be hating on Silent Bob right now (though when hasn’t it been?), but I assumed Ebert would know better....
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Frunds
Dale: hey
Jake: What's up, Broseph Goebbels?
Dale: It was actually this first year girl who said "hey" but she got scared and ran off when you called me Goebbels.
Jake: Brilliant.
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“I wouldn’t press the button and live a normal life. Not for all the tea in...”
– Stephen Fry in The Secret Life Of The Manic Depressive, a two part documentary about manic depression (which Fry suffers from). One thing all of the people he interviews on the programme have in common is that if they could press a button, and live without manic depression, they wouldn’t.
“Favorite Movies: transformers I & II, Star Trek (wow i sound like a nerd hmm...”
– Almost everything makes me want to hurl society into a giant abyss these days, but none more than Facebook.
“This is an epic use of downtime. I stand in awe, and am ashamed to say that I...”
– Cory Doctorow, I will sodomize you with a lightsaber. What the fuck are you using the word “epic” so casually for? You should know better.
“The doctrine of Fair Use I condemn as quite erroneous
And probably harmful if...”
– Comment of the Year | Why, That’s Delightful!
Goodness knows I love a good Gilbert and Sullivan parody, especially when it combines with the issue of Fair Use.
“In adulthood, Winehouse spiraled out of control after success brought her enough...”
– 34 Sexy Celebrities When They Were Young | Popcrunch
Listen to me, guys, I’m positive this will happen to me. When I’m all famous, I need someone to volunteer to control me. I’ll pay you in literal peanuts. Diamond-encrusted peanuts.
“If there’s one thing that gets my goat, curries it and serves it up on a bed of...”
– A Tale Of Two Cities | Stephen Fry
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“In the 19th and (before the end of the second World War) 20th centuries, the...”
– Abby prompted me to read about the persecution of Jews all day.
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Studio 60 again
[Danny turns on the countdown clock]
Matt Albie: How did it know?
Danny Tripp: How did it know what?
Matt Albie: Exactly how much time was left in the week.
Danny Tripp: Yeah, it's a miracle of technology that we've invented an electronic device that can count backwards from seven.
Matt Albie: But it was off.
Danny Tripp: It has a battery.
Matt Albie: [in horror] So it always knows?
Danny Tripp: Don't endow the thing with special powers Matt - it's a clock.
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Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip
Danny Tripp: Thirty-thousand died in car fatalities last year. Seventeen-thousand of them weren't wearing seatbelts.
Jordan McDeere: What does that have to do with anything?
Danny Tripp: No, it's just you read it all the time. Two guys in a car, one wearing a seatbelt, the other one isn't, they're doing sixty down Mulholland, they blow into a telephone poll, the guy wearing the seatbelt's got two bruised ribs, a cut on his forehead, and the guy without the seatbelt gets decapitated.
Jordan McDeere: [referring to the time she was arrested on DUI charges] I was wearing a seatbelt.
Danny Tripp: I'm sure you were, I'm just not as sure that everyone else on the Long Island Expressway was. When I put a life in danger, it's my own.
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“I could let these dream killers kill my self-esteem, or use my arrogance as a...”
– Kanye West
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Roger Ebert blogs about his recent Esquire article →
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“You know the girl you’re dating is too young if you have to make the...”
– Jimmy Carr
"If Yeezy's paying Lebron, I'm paying Dwayne Wade"... →
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A brief interlude in ironic detachment while we...
Jake: It certainly is quite interesting to me how quickly one can become enamored
Luke: Very
Jake: When I was thinking about [redacted] today, I thought for a moment that she couldn't have been that hurt when I told her I didn't feel the same way, she'd only been out with me twice.
Luke: If the person is intriguing enough, it can only take a chance encounter, and enough attention.
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“With a man, you feel like you’re being taken and you like it. And with a...”
– A sixteen-year-old on Bored To Death
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